Monday, October 22, 2007

BlogRush and hardcore porn!

A couple of months ago, I signed up for Blog Rush, a free service that markets itself as "The fastest and easiest way to instantly drive a flood of targeted readers to your blog...absolutely free". Sounds nifty, doesn't it? I heard about it through a post in September by Kate over at Electric Venom. Less than a month later she dumped them. She hadn't noticed any traffic increase at all.

I had forgotten all about BlogRush until this morning when I received an email from them stating that my BlogRush account had been rendered inactive because my blog "did not pass [their] Quality Review criteria". Not that I really cared one way or the other, but I am curious as to what criteria upon which I failed. Here is their complete list:

BlogRush Quality Guidelines:

- The blog contains unique, quality content that provides opinions, insights, and/or recommended resources that provide value to readers of the blog. Articles, videos, public domain works, press releases, and content written by others are okay to be used on the blog, but the ratio of unique content should far outweigh content from other sources.

- The blog should be updated on a regular basis (at least several times a month) and should not just go a few months between posts.

- The blog should already contain at least 10-12 quality posts. New blogs with very little content will not be accepted.

- The blog's primary contain must be in English. BlogRush is currently not available for non-English blogs.

- The blog should not contain an excessive amount of advertising and links and very little actual content. The focus of the blog should be quality content.

- The primary content of the blog should not be "scraped" content from other sources and/or script-generated pages for the sole purpose of search engine rank manipulation. The focus of the blog should be quality content.

- The blog's content (or advertising) should not contain any of the following types of content: hate, anti-racial, terrorism, drug-related, hacking, phishing, fraud, pornographic, nudity, warez, gambling, copyright infringement, obscene or disgusting material of any kind, or anything considered illegal.


Okay...so let's review...starting with guideline #2. I do publish several times a month, but I will admit not that often. So, perhaps it's this one?

I have no advertising links, nor scraped content from other sources.

I don't think my blog contains "...hate, anti-racial, terrorism, drug-related, hacking, phishing, fraud, pornographic, nudity, warez, gambling, copyright infringement, obscene or disgusting material of any kind, or anything considered illegal". But I have to tell you, THAT sounds like a fucking interesting blog. Wow. Could you imagine? All those vices in one blog would make for some wickedly funny reading, don't you think!? I mean, it may be revolting and disgusting, but WOW!

So I think my next post will be about a jewish hooker who's high on crack, naked, covered in shit, and playing a high stakes poker game against Al Qaeda suicide bombers, who raised funds for their explosives by selling pirated versions of Vista, enticing stupid people to give them their bank card PINs, selling fake Rolexes, and writing a shitload of bad checks. If she loses, she has to have sex with a group of small-dicked KKK members who will tattoo a swastika on her ass. If she wins, she gets to bomb Muslims back to the dark ages. Oh wait...that would be redundant.

Think that would be too offensive for BlogRush? I mean, I bet it would generate way more traffic than they do.

Too funny.