Thursday, December 13, 2007

Google Blocking

Some more ways to speed up your browsing...if you are using Firefox...if you are using IE (any version) you are either a moron or confined to it by your organization.

Using Firefox, and the AdBlock Plus and BlockSite addons, add the following to their list of filters:


Now, Google-Analytics adds a java script file called urchin.js into your temporary internet files folder. This script is used to by webmasters to track who visits their sites, from where, and what they are clicking on.

To further block this site, search for your Hosts file (usually found in C:\Windows\System32\Drivers\etc\ and add the following two lines:

# [Google Inc]

Happy surfing.

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

A Different Christmas Poem

The embers glowed softly, and in their dim light,
I gazed round the room and I cherished the sight.
My wife was asleep, her head on my chest,
My daughter beside me, angelic in rest.
Outside the snow fell, a blanket of white,
Transforming the yard to a winter delight.

The sparkling lights in the tree I believe,
Completed the magic that was Christmas Eve.
My eyelids were heavy, my breathing was deep,
Secure and surrounded by love I would sleep.
In perfect contentment, or so it would seem,
So I slumbered, perhaps I started to dream.

The sound wasn't loud, and it wasn't too near,
But I opened my eyes when it tickled my ear.
Perhaps just a cough, I didn't quite know, Then the
sure sound of footsteps outside in the snow.
My soul gave a tremble, I struggled to hear,
And I crept to the door just to see who was near.
Standing out in the cold and the dark of the night,
A lone figure stood, his face weary and tight.

A soldier, I puzzled, some twenty years old,
Perhaps a Private, huddled here in the cold.
Alone in the dark, he looked up and smiled,
Standing watch over me, and my wife and my child.
"What are you doing?" I asked without fear,
"Come in this moment, it's freezing out here!
Put down your pack, brush the snow from your sleeve,
You should be at home on a cold Christmas Eve!"

For barely a moment I saw his eyes shift,
Away from the cold and the snow blown in drifts..
To the window that danced with a warm fire's light
Then he sighed and he said "Its really all right,
I'm out here by choice. I'm here every night."
"It's my duty to stand at the front of the line,
That separates you from the darkest of times.

No one had to ask or beg or implore me,
I'm proud to stand here like my fathers before me.
My Gramps died at Vimy on a day in December,"
Then he sighed, "That's a Christmas 'Gram always remembers."
My dad stood his watch in the streets of Arnheim ,
And now it is my turn and so, here I am.
I've not seen my own son in more than a while,
But his wife sends me pictures, he's sure got a nice smile."
Then he bent and he carefully pulled from his bag,
The red, and the white .. the Canadian flag.

"I can live through the cold and the being alone,
Away from my family, my house and my home.
I can stand at my post through the rain and the sleet,
I can sleep in a foxhole with little to eat.
I can carry the weight of killing another,
Or lay down my life for my sister or brother..
Who stand at the front against any and all,
To ensure for all time that this flag will not fall."

"So go back inside," he said, "harbor no fright,
Your family is waiting and I'll be all right."
"But isn't there something I can do, at the least,
"Give you money," I asked, "or prepare you a feast?
It seems all too little for all that you've done,
For being away from your wife, daughters, or sons."
Then his eye welled a tear that held no regret,
"Just tell us you love us, and never forget.
To fight for our rights back at home while we're gone,
To stand your own watch, no matter how long.
For when we come home, either standing or dead,
To know you remember we fought and we bled.
Is payment enough, and with that we will trust,
That we mattered to you as you mattered to us."

Speeding up your browsing

I have been playing around with a few addons for Firefox and have two I can recommend which will go a long way to speed up and secure your web surfing.

Adblock Plus (also get Adblock Filterset.G Updater). Combined, these two will prevent most ads from cluttering up webpages, meaning they will take less time to load.

Also get BlockSite, with which you can list sites you want to block. I block* and*. Just make sure you turn off Enable Warnings in BlockSite's options, or you will get that annoying yellow bar at the top of your screen.

I find that blocking google-analytics speeds up web page access. I am starting to make a list of other non-essential websites which pages seem to link to on a constant basis....each one adding to their overall load times. Like* (sorry Cardiogirl...your page loads much faster without it :) ).

So, when a web page loads, take a look at all the stuff being accessed (bottom left of your browser usually). Play around with adding these to BlockSite's list. Let me know :)

Saturday, November 17, 2007

A couple of things I have learned

A couple of things I have learned over the past 45 years.

One is to never, ever give a restaurant more than one chance. Ever. There are too many restaurants around to bother with one that gives crappy food and/or service. Take this evening, for instance. I went with my oldest son and niece to an East Indian restaurant called the Taj. We sat down and waited about 5 minutes before we were even given menus. We weren't asked if we wanted any drinks. Then another couple sat down, and the waiter took their orders BEFORE us. Nice, eh. We walked out, but not before I told the waiter (owner?) that we would never be back. The same thing happened at a Boston Pizza once. We stood at the front for about 10 minutes and not one employee came up to get us a table.

Another thing I learned is that no matter how terrible a government employee is, you can be damned sure he or she will never be fired. Short of killing someone, or perhaps raping a co-worker, a government employee has a job for life. Incompetence that would otherwise make a person unemployable in the private sector is grounds for a promotion in the government. Think I jest...guess again. The only way to get a useless waste of flesh out of a mission critical position is to get him an acting assignment or lateral transfer out of the area. Many employees who shift positions a lot in the government do so, not because they are so dynamic that they are in demand, but because they wear out their welcome and get moved along to be someone else's problem. There is one in my area right now. I have been there since 2005 and I have absolutely no clue what this guy does. At all. I couldn't even guess. I have heard that he has been given several different projects throughout the past few years, and has completed none. Of course, his lack of success is not his fault, according to him. It is the fault of everyone else. As is his butchering of the english language. Do you think he got to his position (CS-2 - would be a junior to intermediate programmer in the real world) because of his skill set or because he speaks a particular language that is under-represented in the IT sector? I'll give you 10 guesses.

Monday, November 05, 2007

Windows Vista...and the point is?

Really...I have been waiting for THE reason(s) to move to Windows Vista. There haven't been any. Vista is a huge resource hog, requiring a huge amount of hard drive space, and RAM, to run (based on their minimum requirements!)

Microsoft itself has a list comparing Windows XP to Vista:

Find, fix, and share photos: Organize, edit, and share your favorite photos with family and friends using Windows Photo Gallery.

Er...okay. How is that any different than any number of 3rd party programs out there that do the same thing?

Find almost anything: Find documents, e-mail, photos, and more in a snap through Instant Search.

Do you really need to constantly search for files? Really? I might do this about once a month...even then, the Search function in XP is fine. Regular users probably store everything in their My Documents folder hard is that to search?

Turn any room into a media room: Manage and enjoy digital photos, music, TV shows, and movies in your living room with Windows Media Center.

Well...XP has this already, but how many people out there actually do this? I know of maybe two, and I believe they both use the XBox to do that, not their PCs.

Play the way you want: Easily install, organize, and play games using Windows Game Explorer.

Interesting, I must admit. Overkill though.

Make movie magic: Retain high-definition quality as you capture, edit, and publish movies from a video camcorder with Windows Movie Maker. NOTE: the HD part only works with the Premium editions.

Now, really...this is a main selling feature? The ability to make a fucking movie. Come on. Buy a Mac if you want to do that. Jesus.

There are other comparisons, mostly in the security area and things like Parental Controls. But is the cost worth all of this?

Upgrade Costs are as follows:
Home Basic is $129, Home Premium is $179, the Ultimate is $299

To purchase the full version:
Home Basic is $259, Home Premium is $299, and the Ultimate is $499!

Many of the features they tout aren't even available on the Home Basic edition. In fact, most of their security and backup features are only available on the over-priced Ultimate version.

This is insane, given the fact that you will have to shell out more bucks for Vista-compatible hardware (many older devices are NOT compatible), the cost of "upgrading" to Vista makes the whole process worthless. Why bother? You would end up with a slower PC with more "hidden" controls (i.e. difficult to figure out how to change settings...MS wants you to run things THEIR way, not YOUR way).

Too many idiots have already gone to Vista. They should have their heads examined.

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Gonna shop in the States

Well...the Canadian dollar just hit 104.92 cents US! I have already ordered things from online, US sources, meaning I have saved approximately 4 cents on the dollar. Plus the simple fact that things are STILL CHEAPER IN THE US! For instance, a couple of months ago I purchased a pocket book. The back cover lists the following: $7.99 US/$11.99 Cdn! If I purchased this book in the States it would cost me about $7.60 Canadian...a savings of more than 4 bucks.

So...with Christmas coming up, I am going to take a trip (whether by car or by internet) to the States to shop. If I spend $500 on Christmas gifts I can still save $24 just on the exchange, not to mention the already built-in cheaper prices.

Other people are doing the same thing, and Canada Post can't handle the increase in mail traffic.

Sharon Budnarchuk, co-owner of the independent Audrey's Books in Edmonton, said she is selling U.S. books at the lower American rate until Dec. 31. She hopes the move will help Audrey's keep its customers.

"We were starting to worry because of what was going on at the store where our customers were looking at every price and leaving it saying, 'We are going to look around.' We know exactly what that meant. They were going online," she said.

"They tell us, 'This is not fair. Our dollar is worth more.' Consumers have had enough."

Heh. Screw retailers. Viva free trade.

Monday, October 29, 2007

Would this be wrong?

I was reminded of a conversation I had with someone several months ago regarding hiring practices as they pertain to gender.

I mentioned that if I were looking for someone to take charge of a large multi-million (or billion) dollar project, one that would take an estimated 1-2 years to complete, I would not hire a woman of child-rearing age unless I knew she intended not to have children. Sounds terrible, right? The PC section of your brain is now in overdrive? To be fair, I wouldn't hire a man if I knew he was planning to take a year or so off in the middle of the project for any reason (paternity leave, sabbatical, etc.). I would need someone for the length of the project. That simple. However, the minute you mention "woman" and "pregnant" and "not hire her" in the same sentence, all hell usually breaks loose.

The same goes for a position which requires a lot of expensive training. Why would I train someone as a fighter pilot (which could cost a few million bucks depending on the complexity of the aircraft) only to have (nay, expect) that person to leave for a year, or more, once training is complete? You could replace "fighter pilot" with "firefighter" or "police officer". Same question applies.

On the subject of firefighters, too many times I have read about the double-fitness standard that is being used to have a more "gender-balanced" firefighting force. Excuse me? When I am stuck in a burning building and need a firefighter to carry me down several flights of stairs, I want to see a big, burly guy who can bench press a pickup instead of a 5 foot 4 inch woman who only had to pass a dumbed-downed, simplified fitness test. Sorry...I know it sounds sexist, but Jesus. I weigh over 200 lbs fer crissakes. And yes, there are women strong enough to pass the regular test, I am sure, but these would be few and far between.

It seems that common sense has been left by the wayside in the quest of "gender equality". So much so that any discussion of the qualification of a candidate for any position cannot use gender, when in point of fact it should be a consideration.

Monday, October 22, 2007

BlogRush and hardcore porn!

A couple of months ago, I signed up for Blog Rush, a free service that markets itself as "The fastest and easiest way to instantly drive a flood of targeted readers to your blog...absolutely free". Sounds nifty, doesn't it? I heard about it through a post in September by Kate over at Electric Venom. Less than a month later she dumped them. She hadn't noticed any traffic increase at all.

I had forgotten all about BlogRush until this morning when I received an email from them stating that my BlogRush account had been rendered inactive because my blog "did not pass [their] Quality Review criteria". Not that I really cared one way or the other, but I am curious as to what criteria upon which I failed. Here is their complete list:

BlogRush Quality Guidelines:

- The blog contains unique, quality content that provides opinions, insights, and/or recommended resources that provide value to readers of the blog. Articles, videos, public domain works, press releases, and content written by others are okay to be used on the blog, but the ratio of unique content should far outweigh content from other sources.

- The blog should be updated on a regular basis (at least several times a month) and should not just go a few months between posts.

- The blog should already contain at least 10-12 quality posts. New blogs with very little content will not be accepted.

- The blog's primary contain must be in English. BlogRush is currently not available for non-English blogs.

- The blog should not contain an excessive amount of advertising and links and very little actual content. The focus of the blog should be quality content.

- The primary content of the blog should not be "scraped" content from other sources and/or script-generated pages for the sole purpose of search engine rank manipulation. The focus of the blog should be quality content.

- The blog's content (or advertising) should not contain any of the following types of content: hate, anti-racial, terrorism, drug-related, hacking, phishing, fraud, pornographic, nudity, warez, gambling, copyright infringement, obscene or disgusting material of any kind, or anything considered illegal. let's review...starting with guideline #2. I do publish several times a month, but I will admit not that often. So, perhaps it's this one?

I have no advertising links, nor scraped content from other sources.

I don't think my blog contains "...hate, anti-racial, terrorism, drug-related, hacking, phishing, fraud, pornographic, nudity, warez, gambling, copyright infringement, obscene or disgusting material of any kind, or anything considered illegal". But I have to tell you, THAT sounds like a fucking interesting blog. Wow. Could you imagine? All those vices in one blog would make for some wickedly funny reading, don't you think!? I mean, it may be revolting and disgusting, but WOW!

So I think my next post will be about a jewish hooker who's high on crack, naked, covered in shit, and playing a high stakes poker game against Al Qaeda suicide bombers, who raised funds for their explosives by selling pirated versions of Vista, enticing stupid people to give them their bank card PINs, selling fake Rolexes, and writing a shitload of bad checks. If she loses, she has to have sex with a group of small-dicked KKK members who will tattoo a swastika on her ass. If she wins, she gets to bomb Muslims back to the dark ages. Oh wait...that would be redundant.

Think that would be too offensive for BlogRush? I mean, I bet it would generate way more traffic than they do.

Too funny.

Monday, October 15, 2007



I had my laproscopic surgery on the 10th. In and issues. The doctor also fixed up a slight umbilical hernia I had, which is great...but, of course, that is where I am experiencing the most discomfort (and bruising). I have never had surgery before (unless you count having my tonsils out when I was 5), so I have no idea if any of this is normal. They assure me it is. I assumed bruising...I didn't assume the odd shade of puce.

On another note, I am so glad I live in a country that pays for this. I cannot imagine how much this would have cost in the US.

Going through the surgery was relatively stress free, and I was in and out in less than 4 hours. It's the recovery combined with my ongoing house cleanup/renovations that is driving me nuts.

On Thursday, the guys came to install my gutter toppers and they did a great job. The n Friday, both the flooring and furnace guys showed up at the same time. My new bamboo floors were delivered and my new furnace and humidifier installed. Sweet. Except they forgot to restart the pilot on my water heater. So, here I am trying to squat down when I can barely move to re-light the pilot. It doesn't work ('natch). So I call the company from which I rent the water heater. They tell me that, yes, they can fix it, but the next appointment is not until 5:30-9:30PM on the FOLLOWING NIGHT! To me, renting a furnace means immediate repairs when needed. I told him that I would call them next week and get them to remove my water heater. Heh. That'll piss 'em off. Eventually, I got the thing started on my own (yay).

The next morning, the flooring guys return...they want to install the floors. Um...I specifically told them that they could NOT come that weekend...and there they were. 8:00 AM sharp. Nice.

Next steps: called 1-800-GOT-JUNK to come and clear some old crap out (sofa, old washer and dryer, etc.), get a quote on drywall repairs and painting, and then get the ducts clean. Sigh.

Tuesday, October 09, 2007

Angry Penguin

Wow...two blog posts on the same day...look outside, quickly...pigs have GOT to be flying...

Swiped this pick from Terminally Incoherent. Too funny, given my blog name...gory though

Home Renovations and a potential Money Pit

I own a house - I took ownership on Sept 14th. The house already had a new roof and all new windows, which is great, and a remodeled kitchen. It does, however, need new flooring throughout (even the aforementioned kitchen), a new interior paint job, and a new furnace (the current one being about 23 years old). I have budgeted about $23K for the work.

One of the prime attractions though was the size of the backyard and the huge gazebo with a natural gas fireplace and a hot tub! The backyard needed about $5K worth of cleanup since it was a proverbial jungle of weeds and shrubbery. Various animals have made their home there, include voles and a fairly ornery gopher I like to call Norman (gratz to anyone who gets THAT particular obscure reference). But the hot tub has a leak in the pipes that needs hope is that it's a pipe at the pump and heater, else I am in trouble, since the rest of the pipes are inaccessible. Sigh. I don't think they can replace the hot tub as it would entail removing a gazebo wall. Double sigh. I can't imagine the cost involved. It would have to be in the 10s of thousands, for the new hot tub and the gazebo wall.

The gazebo has a trap door which, when opened, exposes the main pump/heater and associated pipes. THIS is where I hope to find the leak. First though is to clean up what else the trap door exposed. Namely, mice had made their home in the insulation surrounding the area, which means I have chewed up foam and some dead, dessicated mice. Fun, eh. I have to clean that up, reinsulate, and block access to more mice. THEN I can clean the tub (since it's filled with mice droppings amongst other dirt), then fill it. Hopefully, the leak is at the exposed pipes.

Now I know why I prefer buying a brand new house. It's actually less work :)

Wednesday, October 03, 2007

The end of PC Gaming?

Since its release, 2kgames Bioshock has been dogged with a bit of controversy. The problem stems from the unannounced installation (stealth install) of a piece of DRM crap called SecuRom, which forces an online activation before you can play the game. Sounds fine, right? But wait, what if, in 5 years, you decide to play the game again and need to re-install your perfectly legitimate copy only to find that the online activation server is no longer operational? now have a $60 useless disc. As well, this software only allows 5 activations! If you reformat your harddrive, buy a new one, etc, and you use up the 5 activations...tough. You can't play the game.

Here's another kicker. If you are running Microsoft's Process Explorer (used to be called SysInternals Process Explorer) SecuRom won't allow you to START the game! Their response to a questions about this was:
'Process Explorer' has dumping capabilities as well as registry monitor / file monitor capabilities. This could be used to trace the behavior of SecuROM.

Therefore, we do not allow the game to start when this software is active.

We have no immediate plans to allow this software in the future.

Best regards,

SecuROM Support Team
SecuROM on the web:
or via e-mail:

Are you freaking kidding me?

I have never been a fan of any copy-protection scheme for software, even the "you must have disc 1 in the drive before you can play your game" kind. In fact, I recently purchased a copy of F.E.A.R. and once I installed it, I immediately downloaded a No-CD Crack, so I don't need to use the disc to play. Screw them. I paid for the game, and I don't want to have to keep putting the disc in the drive every time I start it up. I have done that for every game I have ever purchased (Morrowind, Oblivion, Prey, Doom, etc.) that required that kind of "copy-protection".

So...what will be the aftermath of 2kGames decision? I won't buy the game until they come out with a DRM-stripped version. Otherwise, bite me. Apparently, the same DRM is installed when you download the freaking DEMO! What a bunch of idiots.

If this continues, it will do 3 things...

1. I will stop playing PC games.
2. Since I won't be playing PC games, I won't need a Microsoft OS (XP or Vista) and will then have no reason NOT to switch to Linux.
3. Since I won't be playing PC games AND I won't be running a bloated Microsoft OS, I won't need to upgrade my PC as frequently.

So who is the winner here, other than me and the makers of Nintendo Wii and XBox 360 (which is, ironically, MS)?

Thursday, September 27, 2007

Global Warming Stupidity

Just read an interesting post on the Dilbert Blog on cognitive dissonance. In it, he mentions an interview Bill Maher did with Danish economist Bjorn Lomborg who has written a book called "Cool It". In typical bonehead fashion, Maher and his guests (Salman Rushdie, Rob Thomas (!?!?), and Jeanine Garofalo cut apart Lomborg's statements after Maher interviews him via satellite.

Maher starts off by baiting the author:
However…scientists, almost down the line, condemned your first book. And I noticed that on the blurbs on the back of your book, you don’t – you have two authors, an editor and an economics professor. If the scientists are not saying you’re cool, why should we believe anything you say about this?

Lomborg responds with:
Well, you should not believe what I say. You should believe what I’m actually quoting, namely, the U.N. Climate Panel. When we look at all these things that we’re talking about; for instance, climate change is real; it’s happening; and I’m trying to take us away from that very unproductive dichotomy of saying “It’s a hoax”/ “No, it’s a catastrophe.” It’s neither. It’s a problem.

And let me give you just one example. When we look, for instance, at temperatures rising, it means we’re going to see more heat deaths. That’s absolutely true, and everybody points that out. But, of course, with increasing temperatures, we’re also going to see fewer cold deaths, and we need to know both.

For instance, for Britain, it’s actually estimated that we’re going to see 2,000 more heat deaths in 2050. But 20,000 fewer cold deaths. It seems to me that we’re not going to make good judgments unless we know both things.

Take a look at the transcript, and you will see what I mean. Lomborg offers reasoned points, and Maher and company basically "pretend" to not understand...or they are really that stupid. You decide.

Essentially, Lomborg says "Yes, Global Warming is a problem, but it won't be the catastrophe everyone says. We need to do something about the problem, but at what cost?"

For example, if I could spend a 10th of the money being spent to combat global warming on anti-malaria programs I could save thousands of more lives. Lomborg says we should spend money on research and development of alternative fuel sources. Right now, the rich can afford the extremely expensive solar paneling and hybrid cars, but the poor can't. People in China and India can't. Those people (i.e. the large bulk of the world population) have to be given something they can use as an alternative before we can affect change, otherwise we are trying to empty a lake by using a thimble.

Global Warming is simply the Cause célèbre. The rich and famous will spout off about it, do documentaries on it, perform charity benefit concerts to "raise awareness" about it, and then the whole fad will fade away when the fickle stars move onto the next cause. I mean, Ethiopians are still starving, Africans are still dying of Aids, but those aren't "in" right now. Global Warming is "hot", to paraphrase Paris Hilton.

In any event, Bill Maher and friends need to be rudely awakened.

Thursday, September 20, 2007

Snakes in a mouth many beers would you have to drink before you could put a rattlesnake head first into your mouth? 100...200?

Some guy in Oregon, admittedly a little tipsy on a 6-pack of American beer (which is, what, the equivalent of 2 Canadian beers in alcoholic content?), stuffed his pet rattlesnake into his mouth to amuse his friends....

There are two things wrong with the above is putting a rattlesnake into your mouth...another is to have a pet rattlesnake to begin with!

He comments on his near death experience:
“It's actually kind of my own stupid fault,”

Er..."kind of"? Really? Just kind of?

I think this would have been better if this numbnuts ended up as a Darwin Award winner. With any luck, maybe he will be sterile.

Professional Sports are pointless

The older I get, the less interested I am in any sort of professional sport. I was an avid baseball fan, but became disillusioned/disgusted with MLB when they screwed over the Montreal Expos in 1996 (when the season, and World Series, was canceled). Couple that with the bizarre league finances (the BENCH of the NY Yankees is more than the total payroll of many other teams), and why would anyone whose team has no hope of winning bother to watch?

The NBA is pathetic and dull. NFL football is filled with criminals..and I swear, if I see one more jiggy-dance in the end zone after a touchdown, I think I will throw something through my TV screen. Hockey is just tiring to watch in the regular season...wake me when the playoffs start.

Professional athletes are vastly overpaid, and I think society has to realize that idolizing these clowns is ridiculous. They play a game. That's it. A policeman, firefighter, or a teacher should make more than some semi-literate knob who gets millions simply because he can catch a football.

Friday, September 07, 2007

Men and women

Venomous Kate, over at Electric Venom, recently wrote a post entitled "If You Could Read My Mind..." in which she asked if you really would want to be able to read someone's mind. I responded:

Are you kidding? Every married man is expected to already have this ability! The expectation that we do would explain SOOOO much. I would love to be able to read the minds of women. No more guessing, no more confusion. Peace on Earth!

To which she took exception:
I object. I assure you that I am QUITE vocal about what I want, how I want it done, when I want it, and how freaking happy my husband should be whilst doing whatever it is that I want.

Do I get credit for not expecting him to read my mind? Do I get points for actually using Mr. Lips and Mr. Tongue to tell him what I want?

Hell no. I get called a “nag”.

Someone once sent me a list of "rules" for women, from men. I though it apropos (NOTE: The following opinions are not necessarily those of management, and besides, they are meant to be humorous.)

  1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
    We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us whining about you
    leaving it down.
  2. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find
    the perfect present yet again!
  3. Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.
  4. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
  5. Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then you're stuck with her.
  6. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
  7. Crying is blackmail.
  8. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:

Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
  1. We don't remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on a calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.
  2. Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?
  3. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
  4. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
  5. A headache that last for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
  6. Check your oil! Please.
  7. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
  8. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
  9. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic.
  10. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We refuse to answer.
  11. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
  12. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
  13. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
  14. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.
  15. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out. Get over it. And quit whining to your girlfriends.
  16. All men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
  17. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
  18. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.
  19. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
  20. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
  21. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.
  22. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, baseball, the shotgun formation, golf, or monster trucks.
  23. You have enough clothes.
  24. You have too many shoes.
  25. Foreign films are best left to foreigners. (Unless it's Bruce Lee or some war flick where it doesn't really matter what they're saying anyway.)
  26. It is neither in your best interest or ours to take the quiz together. No, it doesn't matter which quiz.
  27. Beer is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.
  28. I'm in shape. Round is a shape.
  29. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know we really don't mind that, it's like camping.

Here it is, ladies:
the secret to a happy marriage and getting your husband to do what
you want.

Ask him.

Tuesday, September 04, 2007

My experiences with the Great Unwashed

I have for years avoided events like the "Ottawa Super Ex" simply because I can not stand being that close to the Great Unwashed that seem to crawl out of whatever substandard housing they were living under in order to infest dusty social gatherings like local fairs and exhibitions. This past Saturday I attended an event I attend every year with my children and their mother...the Gatineau Balloon Festival. Each year it gets busier and busier, which, believe me, is not a good thing....for there they were, the masses I so wanted to avoid.

They look dirty and unhealthy, they dress dirty...women walking through gravel and dirt fairgrounds wearing some cheap-ass high heel shoes they must have bought at a hooker's garage sale. Cigarettes dangling out of their mouths as they attend to their poor children. Teenaged boys, white, dressed like something out of a Walmart's version of a rapper; hat turned sideways, pants hanging down below their butt cracks, wearing fleece skater's hoodies even though it is boiling out, little faux moustache, and, of course, the ever present deathstick. Teenaged girls, stomachs bared, showing off their white trash tramp stamps, and, of course, the ever present deathstick. You might wonder if their parents are less than proud at the spawn they have produced. Then you see their parents, and wonder at the state of the human race.

IQs are dropping, as the Great Unwashed breed unchecked and unleash their progeny upon a slowly declining world population. Idiots who would not have seen sexual maturity even a hundred years ago because they would have ended up dead through their own misfortune are now protected by the nanny state, and kept alive, in this country and many others around the world at least, through universal healthcare. Morons who can not find any viable means of support now have their lives paid for by taxpayers through welfare and employment programs. You want to know why dealing with the government is so painful, you need not look any further than the masses of unwashed who populate many bureaucracies.

I am not referring to rednecks or hillbillies. Those people have become self-sufficient in a lot of ways. They are able to do a lot of things that even more educated people cannot: tear down and rebuild an engine, hunt, skin an animal. Come the apocalypse, they will survive. No, the Great Unwashed to which I am referring are the white trash living in motor homes, subsisting on McDonald's and the public dole. Who's worth can only be measured by how better the world would be WITHOUT them in it. The lazy and shiftless members of minority classes whose lives seem to revolve on how to avoid work, and how it is the MAN'S fault they have nothing.

These are the people I would love to avoid for the rest of my life.

Monday, August 20, 2007

China,China, China.

My apologies for the lame Brady Bunch reference in this post's title (remember "Marcia, Marcia, Marcia"?), but lately China has been all over the news for even worse reasons than usual.

It seems the Communist bureaucrats, in what can only be a case of one-up-man-ship with the bureaucrats who pollute democracies, have decided to regulate reincarnation. That's right:
In one of history's more absurd acts of totalitarianism, China has banned Buddhist monks in Tibet from reincarnating without government permission.

Pundits stress that this is simply an attempt to control the naming of the next Dalai Lama.

This is the country that was awarded the summer Olympics? In 1980 the US, and other countries, boycotted the Moscow Olympics to protest the Soviet invasion of Afghanistan (how ironic is that?). Why are they not boycotting the games in China? Stupidity? Avarice? Cheap (slave) labour for US multinational corporations? Pathetic.

Monday, August 13, 2007

The US and Socialized Medicine

Back in March of 2006 I posted an article called "Health Care in Canada is Sick and Dying" in which I opined that the Canadian system has many flaws but also contrasted it with the incredibly expensive US system. An obviously American reader posted a comment, anonymously, in which he or she states that:
There's a reason health care in the US costs a lot. Because it's better.
Well, as Michael Moore has shown...not so much. The anonymous comment goes on to say that stories of people dying in the US because they could not afford health care are myths. Again, not quite.

Sure, there is such a thing as free emergency care, but only to people below a certain tax bracket. People with insurance are habitually denied coverage for various reasons. Let's face it, Insurance companies really don't want to pay anything out...this is how they make a profit. So they will try everything to deny a claim. People have declared bankruptcy because of sudden medical bills. This is a fact, though what is disputed are the numbers. Some studies show that half of all bankruptcy claims have some health care related factor. Whatever the number, the personal economic effect of vast medical bills is deplorable.

Some people can afford the insurance. Great. Once you or your spouse gets an iron-clad, gold class, health insurance policy through his/her employer, try leaving that employer and get coverage elsewhere if at anytime you have made a claim. Good luck.

Fred, at tackles this issue in a recent post. In hit he asks some difficult questions:

Now, what do we do with people who have obeyed all the fabled American rules, who have worked, perhaps at pathetic wages and no benefits, and never cheated, and been honest citizens, and then the bottling plant went to China and they’re old and have nothing? What?

We could be good social Darwinists and let them rot. They are not cutting edge people, not Verilog mechanics or optical engineers or hedge-fund managers. Who needs them? All right. If this is your position, say so. Look me in the eye and say, “Screw’em. I don’t care what happens to them and I’m not going to spend a red cent on them.” Say this, and I will understand you.

And later:
It’s different to Mary Sal Wooten in a decaying trailer somewhere on 301 South, with her retinas peeling like wallpaper from diabetic retinopathy, ankles swollen and darkening toward gangrene, and the hospital won’t take her because it isn’t an emergency and she can’t afford her medicine. Really, truly no-shit can’t afford it.

What do we do with people like her? People who just flat can’t handle the complexity of today’s world? It seems to me that anyone who wants to think about socialized medicine has to answer that question before starting.

Fred has more experience than many with the seedier underbellies of American society, and in the backwater towns that litter most of the US landscape. So his opinions have always seemed more valid to me than those of some upper-middle class columnist or blogger whose viewpoint goes little beyond their white picket fence, or through the windows of their Hummer.

His final thought:

What other solutions are available? Many say, “It’s a job for private charity.” This is another way of saying, “Screw’em, I ain’t paying a cent.” Yet others say cut taxes and the resulting economic boom will lift all boats. This is another way of saying, “Screw’em, I ain’t paying a cent.”

But let’s at least have the dignity to say what we mean. The truth is that large numbers of people cannot take care of themselves beyond showing up at work every day and spinning lug nuts on the assembly line. They aren’t going to invest wisely from youth because they aren’t smart enough. Employers aren’t going to provide retirements unless forced to. Hospitals won’t take them if they can avoid it. Do we say, “Screw’em, let’em croak”? Apparently. Then let’s say so plainly.

I believe in capitalism, but the US system is abhorrent.

'Nuff said.

Friday, August 03, 2007

Bridge Collapse

The bridge collapse in Minneapolis is certainly tragic, but this is a more common occurrence lately. A bridge collapsed in Laval, Quebec recently as well, though I don't think there were any casualties, fortunately.

This is what happens when too many critical areas of a country's infrastructure is left solely to the state to maintain. Even in the sue-happy US, can you even take the city/state to court for something like this? You could if a private company was in charge of maintaining the bridge. Contracts should be extended to private companies and paid for with the same tax dollars that are already collected for roadwork (and bridge work). The private company would have the responsibility to maintain the safety and quality of the highways and bridges for which they have been commissioned. The proviso is that they can be sued if the road/bridge is kept in an unsafe condition...especially if a bridge collapses. For larger road/bridge works, allow them to charge a toll for their use.

There's a highway in Toronto (the 407) that is billed as the world's first all electronic open-access toll highway. If you use it, you can either be billed by using a transponder that shows when and how far you travelled on the 180 KM route, or, in the absence of a transponder, the highway uses a video system to track your license plate and you are billed by mail. The highway is privately run and is both well-maintained and efficient. I have no problem with it being a toll highway, and, in fact, would use this model to bring about more efficient highway systems everywhere else.

The kumbaya-singing, sandal-wearing hemp folk would scream about the evils of capitalism, but screw them. Government's can barely handle their own internal processes properly, let alone be in charge of something as large and complex as highway infrastructure.

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Been a while

Haven't posted since the 10th. Have a couple of drafts in progress, but at 2:30 AM on July 16th I found myself in the emergency ward of the nearby hospital with what I believed to be a gallstone attack. I returned home that same day at 6:00 AM. Not bad. Only 3.5 hours in the hospital. Pain had receded. Tests had been run. Good result for a government run healthcare system. In fact, at the initial triage stage, I was immediately moved to an observation room (i.e. I didn't have to suffer in the waiting room).

Tuesday, though I had some residual pain, went by without much of an issue. Then that evening, I had another attack. By 4:00 AM Wednesday morning the pain was such that I went back to the hospital. Once again I was immediately moved to the observation room, and within minutes found myself in a bed hooked to an IV (saline solution). I remained in the hospital until yesterday afternoon. Diagnosis: pancreatitis caused by a gallstone. I didn't eat or drink anything until Sunday afternoon (when I had some cranberry juice and some jello). I ate some "soft" food for the first time yesterday before leaving the hospital.

Seems I will have to make an appointment to have my gallbladder removed in 4-6 weeks.

Now the cost to me was about $60 for the television and personal telephone. I wonder how much a 7 day (8 counting the Monday stint) would have cost me in the States? A friend of mine spent 7 days in a US hospital when he moved down there to work and it cost him $30,000. Hmm...$60 vs $30,000...yeah, I'll pay the higher taxes.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Too funny

I get a newsletter from ZDNet which discuss latest issues and news stories regardiing the computer industry. The most recent newsletter had an article entitled: Securing Firefox: How to avoid hacker attacks on Mozilla’s browser by Ryan Naraine whose ZDNet biography claims:
[He] is a technology news journalist specializing in Internet and computer security issues. His detailed coverage of hacker attacks and security warnings has appeared in a variety of publications, including @NY,,, Yahoo News, Fox News and, most recently, Ziff Davis Media's eWEEK.

That's all well and good. Problem is, the article on Firefox shows screenshots from an old OUT-OF-DATE version of Firefox! Ha haha. Too funny. Makes you wonder how on the ball this guy is...and the editors of ZDNet.


Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Stupid Pet people

I see a pattern developing in my blog titles/topics...I think stupidity is my biggest pet peeve...ironic turn of a phrase, given this rant is about...PETS.

I don't understand "pet people". Animals aren't a member of your family. Given the right (or wrong, depending on your viewpoint) set of circumstances, they will use you as food. Cats I don't like, and consider them a waste of food and water. Dogs, on the other hand, do serve a purpose. However, the minute you treat one as a member of the family is also the minute you take your life into your hands...or the lives of your children. Now, if you own a Lhasa Apso, Pomeranian, or other such tiny dog, fine. But this family had a Rottweiler-German Shepherd cross. They also HAD a 17 month old daughter.

I don't want to add to their suffering, but this could have been prevented by one of two things: either don't own a dog bred for violence or don't let a 17 month old wander over to it. Rottweilers aren't known for being cuddly and fun loving. You can make a case that German Shepherds make good family pets, I suppose, but I don't like them, nor do I trust them.

In a similar vein, a man was recently charged with killing a cat. He hit it over the head twice with a tire iron. The cat had become increasingly violent over a period of several days culminating in an attack on animals the man had. He breeds horses and had various other animals (chickens I believe). Like any farmer/rancher faced with a dangerous animal, he killed it. End of story. Except the city folk got all involved and now he faces charges.

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

Mika Brzezinski

She's my new hero. Google her if you want to see the video of her ripping up pages of copy she was to read about Paris Hilton being released from jail. The thing is viral. It's the number one video flowing around out there.

Apparently, the producers at MSNBC wanted her to lead with that story over some "fluff piece" about the war in Iraq and controversy in the White House. She refused. The two morons beside her, especially host Joe Scarborough, tout the tired line that Paris is news. They simply come across as pandering assholes who should be lynched by anyone who believes the news needs a heavy dose of integrity.

Too many people will defend coverage of this clownette because she "sells". Well, it doesn't matter. A beautiful quote from South Park's Mr. Slave after he defeats Paris in a "whore-off" in the episode "Stupid Spoiled Whore Video Playset":

People, don't applaud me. I'm a dirty whore. [the crowd falls silent] Being spoiled and stupid and whorish is supposed to be a bad thing, remember? Parents, if you don't teach your children that people like Paris Hilton are supposed to be despised, where are they gonna learn it? You have to be the ones to make sure your daughters aren't looking up to the wrong people.

It's funny. I never found her attractive or even remotely interesting.

Friday, June 29, 2007

Protestors block highway

Canada's busiest traffic corridor, between Montreal and Toronto, has been blocked by a small band of Mohawk protesters. Highways 401 and the VIA rail line in that corridor have effectively been shut down to "raise public awareness of native concerns such as poverty, health and land claims.". Here's a newsflash for native people across the country: We don't give a shit about your land claims. Period. Fuck off. When Europeans cames to this continent, you as a race had barely progressed beyond the fucking stone age. You weren't even as advanced as the Aztecs or Mayans. You hadn't even invented the fucking wheel yet! You were a race on an absolute decline.

Land isn't sacred. The Mighty Gitchi Manitou doesn't exist. The Spirit of the Bear won't guide you to enlightenment. Poverty in the reservations is YOUR fault, not the government's. Not the rest of Canada's. You have chosen to live in ignorance and stupidity for decades, and now it is biting you on the ass, and you want us to fix it. The mistake past governments made was in establishing reservations in the first place. If you had been forced to live in the read world all those decades ago, you would be better off today.

You lost. The world has long since passed your culture by. You are irrelevant. Assimilate into the rest of Canadian society, or simply fade away as a failed experiment in social engineering. Either way, problem solved.

Thursday, June 21, 2007

July 21, 2007

Mark that date down in your calendars. If I have to explain what it means, shame on you! No, it isn't the fact that it is my birthday. July 21st is my birthday, but that isn't why I think it is important...though I wish it were :)

No, July 21, 2007 is the release date of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Yay.

Here are my predictions:

1. Snape will be a hero...and...based on a comment by Rowling :
JKR: yeah, you will. Erm - it's - errr - yet again kind of the - in - you won't find out ... OK, in book three, you're absolutely right, you find out a lot about Harry's father. Now, the - the important thing about Harry's mother - the really, really significant thing - you're going to find out in two - in two parts. You'll find out a lot more about her in book five, or you'll find out something very significant about her in book five, and you'll find out something incredibly important about her in book seven. But I can't tell you what those things are, so I'm sorry, but they - yes, you will find out more about her, because they're - both of them are very important in what Harry ends up having to do.

("both", in her quote above, refers to Harry's father...but...)...I think Snape is Harry's father :) He has been charmed to look like James Potter. Snape knows, which is why he was particularly upset that Harry saw his memories in the Pensieve (in Order of the Phoenix)...because Lily was defending him (and being nice to him). He didn't want Harry to know, and thus, Voldemort to know.

2. The Dumbledore that died was actually the brother, the real Dumbledore is still out there. I base that on some subtle differences in the way Dumbledore interacts with Harry in the Half-Blood prince.

3. Hermione will die - killed by Voldemort

4. Neville will die fighting, and ultimately destroying, Bellatix Lestrange, who had driven his parents insane when she used the Cruciatus Curse on them.

5. Harry will live, but in destroying the Horcruxes, and the PART of Voldemort's soul that resides within him (Harry), he will lose his magical abilities.

There....if I am right, I will leave this post up...otherwise...boink...

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Television sucks

Not that this comes as a surprise to someone with at least half-a-brain, but as the post title states: Television sucks! I am in the process of participating in one of those viewing surveys...I think it's a one or two week exercise in which I record the times the TV is on, which programs, and who is watching. Something like the Neilsen's in the States but without the cool, geeky hardware.

Anyways, the first week started last Thursday. It went something like this: from 6:00AM to 6:30AM, while getting my kids up, they watched Giselle's Big Backyard on TVOntario - the station is sort of like PBS without all the telethons. Then, the TV was off until that evening, when my daughter put on a DVD of Friends, season 6. She watched that for about an hour before going to bed, then I watched about 15 minutes of South Park. Friday started about the same, but then in the evening, since my kids were at their mother's, was the DVD Kelly's Heroes. On Saturday and Sunday, the TV never even went on.

Let's face it, the Internet is a helluva lot more entertaining than the commercial-filled crap with which they fill up the airwaves. I will occasionally catch an episode of House and The Simpsons, but not much else.

I can't imagine EVER buying digital cable or satellite. I couldn't justify the cost for something so banal and bland.

Television, in it's current format, is finished. Truly. Viewership is steadily declining. The only hope it has is some sort of war or massive natural disaster...since, let's face it, the best ratings CNN ever got were the first Gulf War and 9/11.

Friday, May 25, 2007

What are they smoking?

If there is any greater indication that the Canadian Radio-television and
Telecommunications Commission (CRTC)
is irrelevant and needs to be dismantled than this latest stupidity, I don't know what else there is.

The CRTC is " independent agency responsible for regulating Canada's broadcasting and telecommunications systems". Among such necessary tasks as allocating television and radio frequencies to broadcasters, they also provide legislation which controls what Canadians can see or hear, including Canadian content legislation (i.e. broadcasters have to provide x amount of Canadian content per broadcast hour, with variances for prime time). They also regulate how many minutes of commercials that broadcasters can jam into an hour of programming. Currently, that number sits at 12.

However, as of Sept 1, 2007, that number will jump to 14 minutes of commercials during prime time (7pm to 11pm). A year later that number will jump to 15 minutes per hour throughout the day (not just prime time).

Why the increase?

Well, it's simple. Ratings are dropping for everything, and audiences are fragmenting. American Idol's finale ratings saw a shard decline from last year, with estimates as high as 23% (though FOX contends it was only a 19% decrease). Shows like "Lost", "Desperate Housewives", and "24" have seen their ratings continually decrease from one year to the next. Experts are touting competition from the Internet as the primary culprit...of course, it couldn't be that people are tired of the same crap over and over again.

So, over-the-air broadcasters in Canada requested that the CRTC allow them to add a subscriber fee to cable subscriptions. That was turned down. Instead, the CRTC decided to increase commercial time, and stated:
"The Commission considers it essential that [over-the-air] broadcasters have the flexibility to maximize advertising revenues to respond to the negative impact of audience fragmentation."

So, in the wisdom of an exceedingly irrelevant bureaucratic white elephant, in order to alleviate the loss of advertising revenue dollars in the face of audience fragmentation (re: loss of viewership), the CRTC has determined that the best solution is to INCREASE commercial time per hour!

I am no telecommunications expert, but how does that work exactly? People, who have been driven away from the idiot box in increasingly large droves, will now tune in because there are MORE commercials? The CRTC has also, apparently, never heard of the PVR...who in their right minds even WATCHES commercials anymore (ok, I will still watch commercials with sexy women in bikinis...but then again, I'm a pig).

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

"You don't have to hang on"

"You don't have to hang on.", and with those words, a father said goodbye to his 3 year old son. A son who did hang on, long enough to watch his favorite hockey team, the Ottawa Senators, win in overtime to beat the Buffalo Sabres and clinch a berth in the Stanley Cup finals. Two hours after the game, in his parents' arms, he closed his eyes for the last time.

Three year old Elgin-Alexander Fraser had been fighting neuroblastoma, a rare cancer of the nervous system, since 9 months of age. Through treatment he fought it off, only to have it return in January in his stomach and vertebrae, and at the end his back was a mass of painful tumors. With fluid dripping into his lungs, his breathing became more and more difficult. He could barely keep his eyes open as the team he loved and so touched began to play in overtime so his parents had to whisper the play-by-play to him. Two hours after the game, they quietly sang his favorite song...incredibly it was the national anthem, "O Canada"...and his strength finally gave out.

This story will touch everyone, and it moved me beyond words. I have a son, only a year older than Elgin.

I would never want to say those words to him..."Go if you want to go now, bud. You don't have to hang on.". Those are words a father should never have to say to his youngest child. His baby. Never.

The religious out there can sigh softly and shake their heads and solemnly say that "God works in mysterious ways", but for me, that is final proof of one of two things: there is no God at all, or if there is one, it is something that does not deserve to be worshiped, praised, or adored. This should never happen.

It was this child's dying wish, almost literally, that his favorite team win the Stanley Cup. But somehow it seems rather perverse to use this child's painful suffering and ultimate death as motivation to win a stupid game.

Because this is hockey, if you are in the States, you will probably never hear this story. You will probably never see a picture of Elgin. He won't make your major newspapers or appear on CNN. Oprah won't do a show on him, and Ty Pennington and the Extreme Makeover folks won't show up at his grieving parents' door and build them a new house. But for those of us here, who have followed this story, seen this boy, and have hoped that some miracle would happen, this is more important than anything spewed forth from the idiot box. And certainly more important than any game.

I am a Senators fan. I have been waiting 15 years for this day. On May 28th, they start their run for the Stanley Cup against the Western Conference champions Anaheim Ducks. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I will be hoping in that perverse way that they win such a frivolous competition for Elgin's sake.

But I won't be watching. I will be playing with my son, or reading him a story, or watching him sleep.

Friday, May 11, 2007

What does this mean?

I can't draw any conclusions from this, but maybe it is something that should be studied in depth...

Take a look at this website at This guy leaves a wallet on the ground and videotapes people who pick it up...and he also reports on if the wallet was returned or not. He also records the approximate (his guess) age of the finder, sex, and race.

Notice a pattern? Strange?

Friday, April 13, 2007

Blogger and Blogspot suck

My most recent post before this one should have included another 2 paragraphs...unfortunately, I seem to have hit some sort of undocumented size limit, since I can't enter in more than what is already there. The last 2 paragraphs should have been:

People post on forums around the world, and so many are illiterate and ridiculous. Many are insulting, racist, hateful, or so incredibly evil in intent and content that it makes you cringe to read them. People hide behind the anonymity of the internet...which gives them the opportunity to state what they REALLY think. Frightening.

People read wikipedia and believe it is a viable and non-biased source of information, but there is little to no professional editing of the online reference source. Knowledge that is flawed. Equally frightening.

Stupidity redux - part 1

More and more, as I surf the internet, I fear for the human race. The stupidity of people both shock and disgust me. Jokes become facts and form the basis of peoples' opinions...opinions without context and without intelligence. Opinions without actual KNOWLEDGE. Take this little gem that's been circulating since Christ was a corporal:

(A) The number of physicians in the U.S.: 700,000.

(B) Accidental deaths caused by Physicians per year: 120,000

(Calculation) Accidental deaths per physician is 0.171
Statistics courtesy of U.S. Dept of Health Human Services.

Now think about this:
(A) The number of gun owners in the U.S. is 80,000,000 (Yes, that's 80 million..)

(B) The number of accidental gun deaths per year, all age groups, is 1,500.

(Calculation) The number of accidental deaths per gun owner is .000188
Statistics courtesy of FBI

So, statistically, doctors are approximately 9,000 times more dangerous than gun owners.

Remember, "Guns don't kill people, doctors do."


Please alert your friends to this alarming threat. We must ban doctors before this gets completely out of hand!!!!! Out of concern for the public at large, I withheld the statistics on lawyers and politicians for fear the shock would cause people to panic and seek medical attention!

There's no context, the "factual statistics" could be made up, but does anyone research it? Even if the numbers were marginally correct, this is meaningless. What defines an "accidental death"...malpractice suits? What about gun owners who kill someone on purpose (i.e. non-accidentally)? Why aren't those numbers mentioned? See, no context. Now, most smart people will see this as the joke it is...but people have actually used it to promote gun culture or the need for more malpractice legislation. Stupidity.

Friday, March 02, 2007

The venomous one

Venomous Kate, over at Electric Venom, recently slammed someone for trying to guilt her into adding his/her blog into her blogroll.

I mean what kind of person attempts to so blatantly curry favour by describing Kate as:
“the perfect woman: smart, sexy and perfectly capable of kicking your ass.”

I mean, she seems "smart", and her photo looks sexy (except for what appears to be a deathstick 'twixt her fingers) with that over-the-shoulder glance, but how can one assume she is capable of kicking someone's ass?? Plus she blitches way, way, WAY too often. I mean the 'tude on her! C'mon. She's frightening.

I mean this guy/gal even used a Trackback to entice her. I mean, really. Some people are freaking pathetic.

Stupid, stupid people

In honour of a new game show hosted by Jeff Foxworthy called Are you smarter than a 5th grader, a local radio station (93.9 Bob FM) had a radio contest which they called Are you smarter than a 3rd grader. The idea was they would ask you three 3rd grade-like questions. You had to get all 3 correct to win 4 seats to an Ottawa Senators game.

Now, as far as I can tell, the people who got through were all are a few samples of some of the questions...and answers...

"If a boy can be a HERO, a girl can be a...?"
Answer: Princess?

"Complete this saying: All clouds have a..."
Answer: water? (two callers answered the same thing!)

"Why are Mercury and Venus hotter than the Earth?"
Answer: ...well...the guy had no clue...said "I don't know" a few times, then finally threw out an exasperated "'cause they're closer to the sun, derrrp??" No shit, dumbass. He was the one who got the HERO/HEROINE question wrong (I added the "derrrp" for emphasis).

"Which ocean is the largest?"
Answer: "Atlantic?"

Sigh. And you just know that some, if not all, of these adults have kids (or are planning to). There were more, but I think my brain just forced out the memory of them in some sort of self-preservation effort. This contest was attempted 4 times (with multiple callers each time) on the first day, and actually went into a SECOND day, before some woman won.

I honestly believe that radio station telephone systems have some sort of IQ tester so smart people get a busy signal when they try to call in. It's either that or a majority of adults are lip-diddling dipshits and numbnuts who have no business breathing in precious air and getting in front of me on the highway let alone breeding.

If these people don't know the answer to some pretty fucking simple questions, how the FUCK are they going to help their kids with school work??

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Crap new blogger2

Well, as is usual, a company has "upgraded" their product and, instead of making things better, have actually fucked everything up. It appears my RSS feed no longer works, and I have no clue how to fix it. The blogger "help" is anything but, so this may be my last post until they fix it.


Wednesday, January 17, 2007


I haven't posted since late November...and there are reasons...whether these are valid to my huge cadre of 3 or 4 regular readers, I am not sure....

My first wife (my oldest son's mother) passed away in her apartment on Dec 2nd. With her family being quite dysfunctional, disorganized, and altogether incapable of organizing a bathroom break let alone a funeral, I took it upon myself to do it for them (organize a funeral that is, they can figure out to to go to the bathroom on their own dammit!). What struck me was what a freaking scam funeral homes are: for the basics it cost approximately $8000 ( about a $1.50 American). On top of that, there are additional expenses for the "casket splash" (flowers that rest on top of the casket - $250), catering for the reception ($650), and a two day obituary notice in the local news rag ($206 - yup...$103 a day...nice, eh?).

I was hoping, and still am, that her final pay and such from work will cover the expense (which it will, it will just take some time to get the paperwork settled). Now, when she was alive she drove me nuts, and she still is after her death. See, she didn't have a will. She has two other kids, both from different fathers. One of the fathers she married and from whom she subsequently separated...leaving him on the hook for things...but at least he has been good to work with through all of it.

So, with the funeral and Christmas, and the new expansion for World of Warcraft, is it any wonder I have been unable to blog lately!!?