Zombies!

I have come to the conclusion that any movie would be made better by the inclusion of zombies! Any movie!

Take the Titanic, for instance. What if the reason the crew was distracted and ran the ship into the iceberg was because they were busy fighting off the zombie hordes? That would rock.

A movie like Gigli, arguably one of the biggest flops in recent years, would probably have been a great hit had the plot changed from:

The mob tells hitman Gigli to kidnap the mentally handicapped brother of a California DA from a mental hospital. While holding the mental patient in his apartment, Gigli starts to fall for Ricki, a "lesbian assassin", who is sent to assist him.


To:

The mob tells hitman Gigli to kidnap the mentally handicapped brother of a California DA from a mental hospital. While holding the mental patient in his apartment, a zombie outbreak ensues, first engulfing the city then the country. Ricki, a lesbian assassin sent by the mob to assist Gigli, makes it to the apartment in time. The three of them attempt to fight off hungry zombies and try to find a way to survive.


Come on, you telling me you wouldn't PAY to see that?

I guarantee that I can make any movie...ANY movie (Disney cartoons included) into a better film idea by adding zombies! Test me!

Comments

Luke said…
OMG! Awesomest idea ever!

Let me do one. Let's see...

Dawn of the Dead (2004):

Change:

A nurse, a policeman, a young married couple, a salesman, and other survivors of a worldwide plague that is producing aggressive, flesh-eating zombies, take refuge in a mega Midwestern shopping mall.

To:

...

Oh... Wait... Nevermind... :)
Steve said…
Ooo...wait...I know:

A nurse, a policeman, a young married couple, a salesman, and other survivors of a worldwide plague that is producing aggressive, flesh-eating zombies, take refuge in a mega Midwestern shopping mall...WITH A SECRET. Slowly they all turn into a new breed of zombie..intelligent, faster, and stronger. Now it's them against humans and the other zombies!

How's that??
Anonymous said…
Oh Sweet Zombie Jesus.....

Really now, Steve.... Disney improved by adding zombies??? You have taken it a bit far there..... lol
Steve said…
Hmmm...how about...

Toy Story - add in a zombie toy (a toy figurine of a zombie) that keeps trying to "consume" the batteries of other battery-operated toys.

Cars - zombie, repo trucks...go around "repossessing" other cars

Snow White - the seven dwarves get turned into zombies by the evil queen and she, along with her animal friends, has to fight her way out of the forest.

Sleeping Beauty - when the Prince kisses her and she awakens, she IS a zombie.

Mary Poppins - the chimney sweeps turn into zombies and start dropping into homes, attacking the humans within.

Old Yeller - Bud kills Yeller...but that isn't the end. No. Bud didn't shoot Yeller in the head, so he comes back as a zombie dog with zombie rabies to take his revenge!

See? Every film!
Anonymous said…
Ummmm..... nope. The Toy Story and Cars 'improvements' would not add to the story.

But the others..... perhaps that could work.... not convinced though.

How about Haunted Mansion??? Oh WAIT - that one already has zombies in it!!!

Still not convinced....
Anonymous said…
I'd pay *matinee* prices to see Zombies.

Popular Posts